The lengthier my writings, the more I tend to stray. As the seriousness of the topic increases (or as my friends ask, “One of your deeper moments again?”), so do the words. On THIS particular subject, I am extremely adamant. Though nothing “new” that the great philosophers haven’t run into the ground will be discussed here, it’s been on my mind… I began work on this painting a very long time ago, and it was with its recent completion that my mind began to work again! One of those “deeper moments”.
I truly wish that I could consolidate this message into one brief, comprehensible sitting… Knowing most of my subscribers are accustomed to short narratives involving my work. Instead, I’ll let “the pen” follow the path and hope I’m blessed with the ability to communicate these thoughts I’ve harbored. Indulge me as I share my thoughts on the subject of “Touching Souls…”.
I’m not so arrogant to believe that I am one of the “chosen few”. I am not an individual with a depth of sensitivity so superior as to fully understand my inclinations, feelings or the personal connections I have experienced in this life. Yet I DO believe I’ve been blessed/cursed with certain emotional “nerve endings” which cause me to react differently than most individuals. My odd responses to external stimulation and sensations. Since I can recall, I’ve cried at things that others considered ridiculous. I’ve laughed at things in which others saw no humor. I tend to notice and cherish things that others easily discard. I analyze things that to others, have no significance. In my art, I’ve often attempted to amplify “the little things”. In “Violin” I sense a determined look. With “Mother & Child“, the obvious love for the newborn. I’d hoped in this recently completed work, to capture the look I sensed in her eyes…
Everyone has heard the term, “…touched my soul”. I wonder, how many fully understand. How many recognize that moment or spend time dwelling on the effect “the touch” has had on them? Some would describe this experience as an “Ah Ha!” moment. There are so many people in the world, in which the “pace” that leads their lives (Yes. Society is leading them), causes them to ignore or miss the opportunity. I believe today, fewer people give thought to the “touching of souls”. It may sound cruel, but perhaps there are simply fewer sensitive people on this earth. Which is why today, more than any other time in my life, I desire, thirst for, yearn for, BURN for, and promise myself to cherish and cling to the opportunity when it’s afforded me…
To experience… To understand a moment when your soul has touched anther, or when someone touches yours, is to feel a rare bond I can only describe as a sensation in which we perceive something without words. Though I have grown to love and anticipate the feeling of “connectedness” that comes from listening to a particular symphony (Ludwig Van Beethoven wrote “Music is the mediator between the spiritual and sensual life”). It’s a “sensation” I have when witnessing a sunrise so magnificent as to think there could never be another more glorious. The topic here, is more to do with what I feel is the “ultimate” understanding and acting upon those “Follow your heart…” stimulations. The “touched my soul” I am referring to, is with regard to human-to-human interaction.
In its simplest form, it’s when you sense someone “speaking to you” with their eyes, their expressions and body language. When there is a magnetism which, when recognized and acted upon by two individuals, eventually may tie those two souls together permanently. When both allow it. When both listen.
When this thinking applies to interpersonal contact… Well, let me expound; an unknown author wrote: “It is by chance you meet, by choice you become friends, by fate you become soul-mates.” True, the occurrence is often one-sided. The divorce rate wouldn’t be what it is if more ‘souls’ made the true connection. Life-long friends wouldn’t lose touch with each other. People would not feel neglected in personal relationships. How many times have we glanced over at another person, felt a certain “connection” (NOT physical attraction) only to be shunned or ignored? BUT when there is a mutual “touching of the soul” a power exists, an energy is created in a way where “all else matters very little…”. I truly believe this.
To have a mutual touching of the souls is to experience something where you both grow to accept that your relationship will not be severed by distance or time. When your “heart” refuses to allow something or someone from the outside to disrupt or destroy this new-found connection. In our lives, when a TRUE touching of the souls takes place, I believe the union, that relationship has the ability to evolve into something that brings us joy and makes us cry. This mutual-merging has the ability to touch us in a way that is more profound than we could have ever imagined.
I also believe when a reciprocal connection is allowed to progress and grow, BOTH are energized and uplifted. In this life I have learned, these are the most important things. It is not about the houses or the cars or the suits or the careers or the neighbors or our peers or… (shall I continue?). My grandparents, Grandma & Grandpa Bowman had this “true connection”. ANYONE could see it in their eyes. AND they were together for life. Their interaction with each other was a “forever deal”.
How many will admit, in ALL reality, during this journey of life, THAT is what we ultimately desire? A touching of the soul. SOMEONE who touches us deeper and more meaningfully than any other experience we have ever imagined. I read, “True intimacy is not physical. It is the opening of one soul to another.” When you have accepted and understand THAT statement, you have arrived! I don’t deny an individual should have personal goals. The college diploma, the career of choice, the home of their dreams. But, what is the value of these things without a love, the unconditional sensation of oneness which exists when two souls meet?
The dilemma? What do we do when all of the negative appears… When the question of our deserved-ness raises its ugly head? Doubts of our own self-worth. How to battle those moments when we take personal inventory, only to feel as if we’ve fallen short of the one we so desperately know belongs in our life? The simplest analogy I can use: The shy school-boy, afraid to ask his secret crush to the dance, for fear of being rejected. When everything and everyone appear against what would otherwise be a pre-destined union, what do you do with what your soul is telling you?. Does this negativity come about as a result of previous failures? The negative attempts to prevent us from pursuing what may be perceived as the most glorious opportunity in our lives? I believe only WE know when someones soul has touched us more deeply than anyone has ever done before. It is in our hands to pursue the inner peace we all desperately desire and deserve. To discover and enjoy the connection between souls which lasts for all time. When THAT occurs…. Indescribable. I’m certain of it. I am quite envious of those who have been so fortunate as to act on their knowledge of what they simply know, is right.
Do you believe in “destiny”? I am beginning to believe that an individual cannot truly experience a touching of the souls until they near their own destiny. In order for two souls to come together emotionally, spiritually, mentally, they had to have journeyed the highways first presented them. For some (like my grandparents), the passage is relatively short and at a very young age they are given an entire lifetime of a meaningful, loving relationship. For others, we are required to traverse canyons, raging rivers… We endure horrific storms and what appear to be insurmountable roadblocks before we finally one day are met with what I laughingly used to refer to as “Meant to be’s…”. In order to do that, our souls must be open to meeting “the destined one” eventually. Unfortunately, our hearts and souls become more guarded as we grow older. As we travel more miles.
The only solution I can come up with, regarding ACTING on these feelings, these premonitions, comes from a 1971 Clint Eastwood movie, “Dirty Harry” There is an infamous line that has stayed with me, for reasons not so obvious. The line most remember: “You’ve got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya’ punk?” The quote that has forever stayed with me? When the bank robber replies, “I gots to know…”
So, when life presents to us, what appears to be a connection of the souls, when that association, that overwhelming feeling comes, the sensation that says “Their eyes, their smile, their laughter AND their sadness, their soul are all speaking to me…” You HAVE to state to yourself, “I gots to know…”. Then, follow your heart.
You may not be accustomed to such openness. The newness and perceived progress may go against anything you’ve ever known. In the beginning, it may even cause discomfort and doubts as to whether or not to allow or pursue this new soul which has touched you. After all, when you expose yourself, you also become a target for hurt, disappointment, let-downs. Frustration, and worse of all, rejection. But if you don’t? You’ll never know…. Allow yourself to go forward with the quote; “I gots to know…” It’s why I had to complete this particular painting.